I recently joined Dr. Karen Sheridan on her podcast, Unlocking Autism: Behind the Diagnosis. We talked about what it's like to find out you're autistic as an adult woman, and what can come after.
Unlocking Autism: Behind the Diagnosis, with Karen Sheridan. We talk about late autism diagnosis in women, grief, burnout, unmasking, and how autism and abusive relationships can overlap.
What we talked about
Late diagnosis and grief. Many women feel relief when they finally have an explanation. Grief often shows up too. For the years spent thinking something was wrong with you, and for the support that never came.
Burnout. Autistic burnout is a recognized pattern. It can look like exhaustion that rest doesn't fix, losing skills you used to have, and having much less room for noise, people, and demands.
Sensory and social differences. A lot of late-identified women spent years pushing through sensory overload and working hard in social situations, without knowing why it all felt so tiring.
Unmasking. Masking means hiding or adjusting your natural ways of being so you fit in. Unmasking is usually slow. It's less about a big reveal and more about noticing where you can stop performing.
Disclosure. I shared a little about my own AuDHD diagnosis and deciding to talk about it openly.
Autism and abusive relationships. Autistic traits don't cause abuse. But things like taking people at their word, working hard to keep the peace, or doubting your own read on things can be used by someone who wants control. You can read more about this on my emotional and narcissistic abuse page.
Community and resources. Women who were missed because they "seemed fine" still don't have enough support built for them. Being around other women who get it matters. That's a big part of why I run my Unmasking Group.
A note on diagnosis
I don't diagnose autism or ADHD (I can refer you to evaluators, though). You don't need a formal diagnosis to find this conversation helpful, or to work with me. If you're self-identified, you're welcome here.
If this sounds familiar, you can read more here about how I work with autistic and AuDHD women.
If you'd like to talk about working together 1:1, you can book a free 15-minute consultation.
Thank you, Karen, for having me. You can watch the full episode on YouTube.
